immaculate griefs

she was a suspiciuos prositute for me, in her early 20's,her lips were painted pink, face not so charming but her complexion was fair.she caught my attention when she was helping an old woman, emancipated , short , wrinkled face , wearing bright red and orange colored sari., her eyeback framed eye glasses too big for her face. young girl brought tea from the stall for this old lady. tea was been given free as it was the 40th day of martydom of Imam Hussain. it was the day of mourinig.that is y people from all age groups were wearing black.but it was spring season and black was looking too odd. it was maing me remeber the harsh winters of sultry heat of the summers.
women were in large number , and i saw a long que of women and small girl who were been given a small meal of bread and cereals . in the mosque some men were sleeping , some were praying, and some were eating, and some were maing the small meal for distribution.
someone was repeatedly announcing something on the microphone, but i hardly was paying attention what was been said.

white sky as white as that adolesent girl , and clouds as few as as the fears of a baby, mildly warm dusk, children shouting, one kid bullying other kids,koyal (bird) singing, two girls their hair dyed golden on a evening walk with a baby, old women sleeping in thier houses, bells of temple resting,flower shops deserted in spring time

i just wanted to thank to her , for her help , i sent her an SMS , Oh she replied , very fast, very very fast. i felt happy may be more than that. as happy as i used to be when in autumn evening me and my mother used to burn leaves to make fire for the kangri(kangri is a firepot used to keep warm by kashmiris in wintet) twilight. she repliid that me she injured her foot , then i callled her up, she didnot picked her phone. then i started thinking she did not like my calling. i was not right , after just 15 minutes she called me, and we talked about for a long. some times what one thinks is not true.but the thinking never stops and one despite getting satisfied in life still find satisfaction incomplete, can i say 'empty'.
As Ghalib a poet in urdu has said that there are thousand desires for every desire i can die for, no doubt my many of my desires got fullfilled but still they are in less number
meanwhile the whether today is gloomy , but a gloomness which one feels cozy or may be like my girl friend whose voie make me feel like dying ember

my friends brother has got injured in the grenade attack in kashmir.sometimes when in the life we or our near ones face the real situations like these, then we feel that we are also having a right to say about suppression and we should know our rights.As i want to share here with the other bloggers that kashmir is under the indias suppression from last 50 decades .before that kashmir was an indepedent state. as million securtiy personnel in the kashmir are dotted in the valley from last 15 years and making the life of people hell ironically india announces in the UN that india is the largest democracy of the world.so absurd.

it was a clear sunny day, as i woke up i liked to sit under sun.sun today seemed to me calm, and caressing like mother.
then i put on my TV, and on evry channel they were showing malnourished Bush, as usual smiling and hiding behind it mass murder of thousands of innocents.
i frankly get pissed off by this Bush as he is getting so much coverage in indian media that the real issues get a backseat.
there were protests in delhi also, left parties and many intellectuls also were present.
the Americans are very vulnerable today , as today all the roads were dotted with police men. and common man had to wait till the vehicles of the Bush can pass through.
thank God that he is not going to stay here long but the ghost of Bush will stay here for long long time