immaculate griefshttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/this blog is about my life experinces which i feel to record here en-UShourly82000-01-01T12:00+00:00immaculate griefshttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/http://data5.blog.de/design/preview/16/9a4b9e2d4c775303c8e3e0104f563d_160x200.jpglife miserablehttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2009/06/25/life-miserable-6389649/2009-06-25T17:50:54+02:00 <p>It is life miserable, empty roads with full of people.<br> I felt empty as the blue sky of kashmir, srinagar,<br> I found myself alone like a barren tree in a desert.<br> Nothing could calm the storm of my anxieties. I was getting depressed, really depressed. I was being cheated. Cheated honestly. Myself was really bizarre, trivial, a waste, a forgotten memory. World to me a masked murderer. .<br> But the most hated thing of myself is that I show the helpness to other people, I want to trade my helplessness for free.<br> I wanted to ask the questions, questions whose answers I always knew.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2009/06/25/life-miserable-6389649/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>It is life miserable, empty roads with full of people.
I felt empty as the blue sky of kashmir, srinagar,
I found myself alone like a barren tree in a desert.
Nothing could calm the storm of my anxieties. I was getting depressed, really depressed. I was being cheated. Cheated honestly. Myself was really bizarre, trivial, a waste, a forgotten memory. World to me a masked murderer. .
But the most hated thing of myself is that I show the helpness to other people, I want to trade my helplessness for free.
I wanted to ask the questions, questions whose answers I always knew.

Comments

]]>K .............killings.................kashmirhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2009/03/26/k-killings-kashmir-5837188/2009-03-26T17:13:00+01:00 <p>word 'kashmir', once upon a time used to bring images of mounatins, lakes, pink lotuses in Nigeen lake, early morning prayer at Temple in Haripharbat. Shankracharya temple looking at you from in the cloudy day. At Badamwari almond tree blossom in March. All are now images which i can recall but not see, not because i am about one thousand kilometers away from it but they all precious blessings have been killed.<br> K word now is Killing and not kashmir.I feel sad, when ever i read in newspaper that X number of People were killing in voilence.They may be locals, or Army personell.<br> There are now more orphanages in Kashmir, "Yateem trusts", as every year thousand sons and daughters of kashmir have to become custodians of the grave of there father.<br> Tulip garden may be largest tulip garden in Asia but can there red colors be more red than the blood which is shed every day on the roads, small lanes, near the blue mountains of the Heaven.who will apprecaite tulips when there is blood every where in kashmir. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2009/03/26/k-killings-kashmir-5837188/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>word 'kashmir', once upon a time used to bring images of mounatins, lakes, pink lotuses in Nigeen lake, early morning prayer at Temple in Haripharbat. Shankracharya temple looking at you from in the cloudy day. At Badamwari almond tree blossom in March. All are now images which i can recall but not see, not because i am about one thousand kilometers away from it but they all precious blessings have been killed.
K word now is Killing and not kashmir.I feel sad, when ever i read in newspaper that X number of People were killing in voilence.They may be locals, or Army personell.
There are now more orphanages in Kashmir, "Yateem trusts", as every year thousand sons and daughters of kashmir have to become custodians of the grave of there father.
Tulip garden may be largest tulip garden in Asia but can there red colors be more red than the blood which is shed every day on the roads, small lanes, near the blue mountains of the Heaven.who will apprecaite tulips when there is blood every where in kashmir.

Comments

]]>Poem Titled " Nautch girls "http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2009/03/20/poem-titled-nautch-girls-5794568/2009-03-20T14:16:24+01:00 <p>Nautch Girls</p> <p>Kashmir ,<br> white Bangles of Nautch girls<br> Sea ,<br> Memories of mountains melting into it<br> Nautch girls<br> First exiles<br> Hangul , samovar , silver embroidered phiren<br> Hookah<br> Black bangles of Nautch girls<br> Nautch girls<br> Singing blues<br> Snow falling from their eyes<br> On the sea of Bombay<br> Red Bangles of Nautch girls<br> Snow-white feets<br> Dancing on the sea of wine<br> Veil hovering<br> Will it embrace?<br> Kashmir<br> Nautch girls<br> Last exiles.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2009/03/20/poem-titled-nautch-girls-5794568/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>Nautch Girls

Kashmir ,
white Bangles of Nautch girls
Sea ,
Memories of mountains melting into it
Nautch girls
First exiles
Hangul , samovar , silver embroidered phiren
Hookah
Black bangles of Nautch girls
Nautch girls
Singing blues
Snow falling from their eyes
On the sea of Bombay
Red Bangles of Nautch girls
Snow-white feets
Dancing on the sea of wine
Veil hovering
Will it embrace?
Kashmir
Nautch girls
Last exiles.

Comments

]]>kashmir imprisoned by Indian Army, is Manmohan singh a second SAddam hussainhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/08/28/kashmir-imprisoned-by-indian-army-is-manmohan-singh-a-second-saddam-hussain-4649552/2008-08-28T16:32:18+02:00 <p>i am feeling a lot of uneasiness, and helpless in the curfew imposed by Indian paramilitary armed forces in srinagar and other parts of kashmir. yesterday and today curfew was relaxed for only two hours in the evening.<br> Indian army has literally improsined us . i am now realising how important is freedom for kashmir.<br> i may not be incorrect if i compare the Manmohan singh, india PM with the Sadaam Hussian of Iraq.<br> We kashmiris are facing hard time. we have diffculty in getting milk , vegetables, medicines. etc.<br> no newspapers have been published from last week. even on the radio and TV our helpnesses is never shown.<br> we are dying under the jackboots of Indian army,<br> yesterday one boy around 9 years old was killed in Rainawari area of downtown area of srinagar by Indian army.<br> people are been killed and irony is that deaths are never been counted. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/08/28/kashmir-imprisoned-by-indian-army-is-manmohan-singh-a-second-saddam-hussain-4649552/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>i am feeling a lot of uneasiness, and helpless in the curfew imposed by Indian paramilitary armed forces in srinagar and other parts of kashmir. yesterday and today curfew was relaxed for only two hours in the evening.
Indian army has literally improsined us . i am now realising how important is freedom for kashmir.
i may not be incorrect if i compare the Manmohan singh, india PM with the Sadaam Hussian of Iraq.
We kashmiris are facing hard time. we have diffculty in getting milk , vegetables, medicines. etc.
no newspapers have been published from last week. even on the radio and TV our helpnesses is never shown.
we are dying under the jackboots of Indian army,
yesterday one boy around 9 years old was killed in Rainawari area of downtown area of srinagar by Indian army.
people are been killed and irony is that deaths are never been counted.

Comments

]]>Jaipur tragedy, Delhi and thousand splendid suns....http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/05/16/jaipur-tragedy-delhi-and-thousand-splend-4181915/2008-05-16T14:49:06+02:00 <p>the recent bomb epsidoe in Jaipur famous for its Forts and palaces was really a sad event, and when i read in the newspaper that some Bangladeshi muslims did this gruesome and pathetic job , i was really ashamed of being a muslim.<br> As i live in New Delhi , here there were no sign of anger, or frustation among Delhities. No body really discussed it. I think now India has developed a tolerance for these type of tragedies.<br> Delhi is getting hotter and hotter, i really hate to go out, but one thing i llike about this season that is sweet, delicious , yellow , Juicy mangoes. yes they are in the market.<br> i can hear every mornng fruit hawker carrying mangoes in our street.<br> i am re-reading Thousand splendid suns by Khaled Hussiani" it is really a book which one should read if one wants to know about the havoc of war in Afghanistan, and the closed society of Muslim world. i was really moved by the line when mother does nt want her girl to go to school. as her mother fears many things that she will be pinpointed that she is illegitimate child and secondly she will not benift any thing from the education as real education is the learing how to do household chores.<br> yes even in this modern age you will find these types of fears, and hopelessnes in many parts of the world, i wont say that it happens only in the muslim socities of Afghanistan but i have witnessed these type of storis in kashmir also, in other parts of India also.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/05/16/jaipur-tragedy-delhi-and-thousand-splend-4181915/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>the recent bomb epsidoe in Jaipur famous for its Forts and palaces was really a sad event, and when i read in the newspaper that some Bangladeshi muslims did this gruesome and pathetic job , i was really ashamed of being a muslim.
As i live in New Delhi , here there were no sign of anger, or frustation among Delhities. No body really discussed it. I think now India has developed a tolerance for these type of tragedies.
Delhi is getting hotter and hotter, i really hate to go out, but one thing i llike about this season that is sweet, delicious , yellow , Juicy mangoes. yes they are in the market.
i can hear every mornng fruit hawker carrying mangoes in our street.
i am re-reading Thousand splendid suns by Khaled Hussiani" it is really a book which one should read if one wants to know about the havoc of war in Afghanistan, and the closed society of Muslim world. i was really moved by the line when mother does nt want her girl to go to school. as her mother fears many things that she will be pinpointed that she is illegitimate child and secondly she will not benift any thing from the education as real education is the learing how to do household chores.
yes even in this modern age you will find these types of fears, and hopelessnes in many parts of the world, i wont say that it happens only in the muslim socities of Afghanistan but i have witnessed these type of storis in kashmir also, in other parts of India also.

Comments

]]>spring in Delhihttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/03/15/spring-in-delhi-3882602/2008-03-15T17:37:51+01:00<p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/03/15/spring-in-delhi-3882602/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p> Comments

]]>meeting with Afghan refugee in New Delhihttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/01/06/meeting_with_afghan_refugee_in_new_delhi~3535703/2008-01-06T11:45:44+01:00 <p> Few days’ back; I went to place of one Afghan refugee man. He had a small room, and a good terrace; the terrace was filled with winter sun. He opened the iron door of the room, on which the earlier tenants had written graffiti in black marker.<br> Just opposite the room was a poster of Afghan tourism and a air port was been shown on the brown mountain. Just looking at the poster one tries to search the Burqa clad women and dilapidated housed in the poster.<br> His room was filled with his longing for the home country, the photos of the wall of two young men, probably his brothers.<br> He talked eloquently; He was not tall but well built, and expressive green eyes.<br> He talked of his fiancée that was in Australia; he too would join them soon. He was waiting for the Visa.<br> He spoke in broken Hindi, but it was sweet with accent of his native language.<br> Meeting him was a treat; he was a gypsy carrying himself with the city he was living.<br> He praised the raisins and showed hatred towards the people who drank wine. The fear of Taliban is so much in the minds of Afghan men that still they cant accept the western or liberal life o f style though they may live thousands of miles away from the turban and beard men.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2008/01/06/meeting_with_afghan_refugee_in_new_delhi~3535703/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p> Few days’ back; I went to place of one Afghan refugee man. He had a small room, and a good terrace; the terrace was filled with winter sun. He opened the iron door of the room, on which the earlier tenants had written graffiti in black marker.
Just opposite the room was a poster of Afghan tourism and a air port was been shown on the brown mountain. Just looking at the poster one tries to search the Burqa clad women and dilapidated housed in the poster.
His room was filled with his longing for the home country, the photos of the wall of two young men, probably his brothers.
He talked eloquently; He was not tall but well built, and expressive green eyes.
He talked of his fiancée that was in Australia; he too would join them soon. He was waiting for the Visa.
He spoke in broken Hindi, but it was sweet with accent of his native language.
Meeting him was a treat; he was a gypsy carrying himself with the city he was living.
He praised the raisins and showed hatred towards the people who drank wine. The fear of Taliban is so much in the minds of Afghan men that still they cant accept the western or liberal life o f style though they may live thousands of miles away from the turban and beard men.

Comments

]]>Benazir and Power POliticshttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/12/30/benazir_and_power_politics~3505542/2007-12-30T07:26:14+01:00 <p>Benazir Bhutto was assianted few days back, the indian media showed her story again and again. In my home my parents were really feeling sad about her killing. shia community had a soft corner for Bhutto family, they believe that Butto's are shia, i dont know really are they or not?<br> the regular column writers in Indian dailies were not clear whether her death is a decline of democracy or not. some beleive that Benazir was very good at camoflouging her colors.<br> whatever, i personally wont mourn her death as i think she wanted 'power'and her greed for power was evident when she found gulity of corruption charges some years back.<br> the people who say that she would have made democracy alive agian in Pakistan, i ask them , can Narendra Modi be a torch bearer of democracy.i think we need to find the rational meaning of democracy in the world of power politics.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/12/30/benazir_and_power_politics~3505542/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>Benazir Bhutto was assianted few days back, the indian media showed her story again and again. In my home my parents were really feeling sad about her killing. shia community had a soft corner for Bhutto family, they believe that Butto's are shia, i dont know really are they or not?
the regular column writers in Indian dailies were not clear whether her death is a decline of democracy or not. some beleive that Benazir was very good at camoflouging her colors.
whatever, i personally wont mourn her death as i think she wanted 'power'and her greed for power was evident when she found gulity of corruption charges some years back.
the people who say that she would have made democracy alive agian in Pakistan, i ask them , can Narendra Modi be a torch bearer of democracy.i think we need to find the rational meaning of democracy in the world of power politics.

Comments

]]>poem titled 'my valley"http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/11/19/poem_titled_my_valley~3318240/2007-11-19T08:16:24+01:00 <p>        <strong>My Valley</p> <p></strong>Among silence of Zabarwan mountains </p> <p>suffering was kept like treasure</p> <p>graves fallen in love with young men</p> <p>chinar leaves smell of blood in autumn</p> <p>sun here may faint anytime</p> <p>black Burqa clad women</p> <p>protesting for nothing , for nothing dear , for nothing</p> <p>all dissent voices been nailed to death</p> <p>in the pink blossom of spring</p> <p>in long summers</p> <p>and in the dark winters </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/11/19/poem_titled_my_valley~3318240/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>        My Valley

Among silence of Zabarwan mountains

suffering was kept like treasure

graves fallen in love with young men

chinar leaves smell of blood in autumn

sun here may faint anytime

black Burqa clad women

protesting for nothing , for nothing dear , for nothing

all dissent voices been nailed to death

in the pink blossom of spring

in long summers

and in the dark winters

Comments

]]>poem titled : october in Delhihttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/11/09/poem_titled_october_in_delhi~3270112/2007-11-09T14:30:55+01:00 <p>The time is running out<br> Grey colored pigions don’t visit me<br> I am still unpainted<br> Like the little girl<br> My reflection was not mine<br> The guy at the ATM works and study<br> The farmer in the hospital was sowing seeds<br> I was unwanted today by women<br> I didn’t see any planes today from my small window<br> The poor childen were runnig bare feet<br> Collecting the sweets on the festival<br> the water will be freezing on the mountains<br> Her eyes will have no more wet this winter<br> . </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/11/09/poem_titled_october_in_delhi~3270112/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>The time is running out
Grey colored pigions don’t visit me
I am still unpainted
Like the little girl
My reflection was not mine
The guy at the ATM works and study
The farmer in the hospital was sowing seeds
I was unwanted today by women
I didn’t see any planes today from my small window
The poor childen were runnig bare feet
Collecting the sweets on the festival
the water will be freezing on the mountains
Her eyes will have no more wet this winter
.

Comments

]]>poem titled " Missing Home"http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/03/19/poem_titled_missing_home~1930592/2007-03-19T08:17:33+01:00 <p> Missing Home<br> (this poem is dedicated to all the pandit migrants of kashmir whose homes were burnt down in the 90's in kashmir.now somebody else surrepttiously lives in their houses) </p> <p>my home missing<br> from the map of valley<br> of snow capped peaks</p> <p>my favorite cozy corner<br> my small prayer room<br> and cold shadowy attic<br> all vanished<br> under curtian of azure smoke</p> <p>only memory was parceled to me<br> as it was fire-proof</p> <p>my home looking blue<br> blue as ill peoples hopes</p> <p>Bare earth of my dank garden<br> in desolation<br> not a single poplar leaf<br> sleeping cozily in her warmth]</p> <p>i wish for pleasant<br> april sunshine<br> and quite rain<br> falling over my courtyard<br> of missing home</p> <p>lined door of oak<br> awake, waiting<br> for my sun burnt hands<br> to have last handshake<br> and say last adieu </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/03/19/poem_titled_missing_home~1930592/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p> Missing Home
(this poem is dedicated to all the pandit migrants of kashmir whose homes were burnt down in the 90's in kashmir.now somebody else surrepttiously lives in their houses)

my home missing
from the map of valley
of snow capped peaks

my favorite cozy corner
my small prayer room
and cold shadowy attic
all vanished
under curtian of azure smoke

only memory was parceled to me
as it was fire-proof

my home looking blue
blue as ill peoples hopes

Bare earth of my dank garden
in desolation
not a single poplar leaf
sleeping cozily in her warmth]

i wish for pleasant
april sunshine
and quite rain
falling over my courtyard
of missing home

lined door of oak
awake, waiting
for my sun burnt hands
to have last handshake
and say last adieu

Comments

]]>Omar abdullah siad that hestays in KAshmir for only 15 days in a yearhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/01/10/omar_abdullah_siad_that_hestays_in_kashm~1537180/2007-01-10T13:15:01+01:00 <p>recenty read the interview of NAtional conference leader Omar abdullah in one of national newspaper of India that he stsys in KAshmir for only 15 days in a year. Rest of the year he stays in NEw Delhi .I thinks that is too much from so called leaders of kashmir. come next elections , he will speak tedious speeches about suffering of kashmir and ongoing turmiol in kashmir. i hope he should speak of Delhi malls, movies and page 3 parties .these are things he is involed in delhi and has no right to speak for kashmir in the next elections.<br> long live the kashmiri movement of freedom and let us try to show the real monarchy happening in kashmir under the veil of Democracy . </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2007/01/10/omar_abdullah_siad_that_hestays_in_kashm~1537180/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>recenty read the interview of NAtional conference leader Omar abdullah in one of national newspaper of India that he stsys in KAshmir for only 15 days in a year. Rest of the year he stays in NEw Delhi .I thinks that is too much from so called leaders of kashmir. come next elections , he will speak tedious speeches about suffering of kashmir and ongoing turmiol in kashmir. i hope he should speak of Delhi malls, movies and page 3 parties .these are things he is involed in delhi and has no right to speak for kashmir in the next elections.
long live the kashmiri movement of freedom and let us try to show the real monarchy happening in kashmir under the veil of Democracy .

Comments

]]>indian goverment's decision of hanging to death Afzal Garoo.http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/10/14/indian_goverment_s_decision_of_hanging_t~1220506/2006-10-14T14:06:12+02:00 <p>i came back from kashmir from long vacations. kashmir is still not peaceful.from last cople of weeks people of kashmir were very disturbed by the indian goverment's decision of hanging to death Afzal Garoo. He has been sent to gallows by indian govt as they suspect him terrorist..................<br> there had been protests by the people of kashmir .people are very angry over the decision of the govt. of india.people say that the if Afzal Garoo is hanged , it will make the movement of kashmiri people stonger and the resistance of the people will also get alleviated.<br> i hope that this time indain govt will act like a terrorist and will make a insight about the violation of human rights in kashmir. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/10/14/indian_goverment_s_decision_of_hanging_t~1220506/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>i came back from kashmir from long vacations. kashmir is still not peaceful.from last cople of weeks people of kashmir were very disturbed by the indian goverment's decision of hanging to death Afzal Garoo. He has been sent to gallows by indian govt as they suspect him terrorist..................
there had been protests by the people of kashmir .people are very angry over the decision of the govt. of india.people say that the if Afzal Garoo is hanged , it will make the movement of kashmiri people stonger and the resistance of the people will also get alleviated.
i hope that this time indain govt will act like a terrorist and will make a insight about the violation of human rights in kashmir.

Comments

]]>visit to Hospital in kasmir , indiahttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/09/25/visit_to_hospital_in_kasmir_india~1158507/2006-09-25T12:48:27+02:00 <p>it was busy Govt. hospital in srinagar, kashmir india ailing patients from different age groups holding the glucose drip in their tired hands, no attendents available, pateints hunching on the floor and doctors never mind it. one gets imaage of HIV pateints of Africa who are left on thier own.<br> i got surpried on the space of emergecy, it was too small for the number of pateints. the strecther was painted red and was mere iron made, no mattres here<br> as this hospital of valley hates comfort of the patients. the lawns of the hospital are very big but ironically the emergency too small.<br> even serious patients had to wait for atleast half an hour to get the chance for treatment.<br> india is strange, so are the people who never raise voice agaist the problems. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/09/25/visit_to_hospital_in_kasmir_india~1158507/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>it was busy Govt. hospital in srinagar, kashmir india ailing patients from different age groups holding the glucose drip in their tired hands, no attendents available, pateints hunching on the floor and doctors never mind it. one gets imaage of HIV pateints of Africa who are left on thier own.
i got surpried on the space of emergecy, it was too small for the number of pateints. the strecther was painted red and was mere iron made, no mattres here
as this hospital of valley hates comfort of the patients. the lawns of the hospital are very big but ironically the emergency too small.
even serious patients had to wait for atleast half an hour to get the chance for treatment.
india is strange, so are the people who never raise voice agaist the problems.

Comments

]]>Autumn chinars in late summerhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/09/23/autumn_chinars_in_late_summer~1152573/2006-09-23T10:16:04+02:00 <p>on the shawl<br> Autumn chinars in late summer<br> chinar trees absent<br> hands of artist shedding<br> them on the shawl<br> my heart a matyr<br> murdered by scentless, soundless rain<br> lone blue kingfisher<br> mediating over thousand fishes<br> soft hands of clouds<br> erasing the Zabarwan mountains</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/09/23/autumn_chinars_in_late_summer~1152573/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>on the shawl
Autumn chinars in late summer
chinar trees absent
hands of artist shedding
them on the shawl
my heart a matyr
murdered by scentless, soundless rain
lone blue kingfisher
mediating over thousand fishes
soft hands of clouds
erasing the Zabarwan mountains

Comments

]]>Autumn chinars in late summerhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/09/23/autumn_chinars_in_late_summer~1152565/2006-09-23T10:12:40+02:00 <p>on the shawl<br> Autumn chinars in late summer<br> chinar trees absent<br> hands of artist shedding<br> them on the shawl<br> my heart a matyr<br> murdered by scentless, soundless rain<br> lone blue kingfisher<br> mediating over thousand fishes<br> soft hands of clouds<br> erasing the Zabarwan mountains</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/09/23/autumn_chinars_in_late_summer~1152565/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>on the shawl
Autumn chinars in late summer
chinar trees absent
hands of artist shedding
them on the shawl
my heart a matyr
murdered by scentless, soundless rain
lone blue kingfisher
mediating over thousand fishes
soft hands of clouds
erasing the Zabarwan mountains

Comments

]]>poem titled "Death of fish and dream"http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/05/17/poem_titled_death_of_fish_and_dream~807213/2006-05-17T16:24:18+02:00 <p> Death of fish and dream</p> <p>lights go out<br> a suicide and murder happens<br> room now a bottom of lake<br> fish in aqurium moving fast<br> restless and ready to die<br> only few are left<br> black and orange colored one<br> death,death , a mellowing death<br> has come<br> soft and with silent gestures<br> last breath is not estranger<br> to our last death<br> we are estranged forever<br> to our last lost country<br> yes sun has come out<br> my dreams suffocating like fish<br> both die in front of my eyes</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/05/17/poem_titled_death_of_fish_and_dream~807213/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p> Death of fish and dream

lights go out
a suicide and murder happens
room now a bottom of lake
fish in aqurium moving fast
restless and ready to die
only few are left
black and orange colored one
death,death , a mellowing death
has come
soft and with silent gestures
last breath is not estranger
to our last death
we are estranged forever
to our last lost country
yes sun has come out
my dreams suffocating like fish
both die in front of my eyes

Comments

]]>prositute helping an old ladyhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/23/prositute_helping_an_old_lady~668800/2006-03-23T13:49:30+01:00 <p>she was a suspiciuos prositute for me, in her early 20's,her lips were painted pink, face not so charming but her complexion was fair.she caught my attention when she was helping an old woman, emancipated , short , wrinkled face , wearing bright red and orange colored sari., her eyeback framed eye glasses too big for her face. young girl brought tea from the stall for this old lady. tea was been given free as it was the 40th day of martydom of Imam Hussain. it was the day of mourinig.that is y people from all age groups were wearing black.but it was spring season and black was looking too odd. it was maing me remeber the harsh winters of sultry heat of the summers.<br> women were in large number , and i saw a long que of women and small girl who were been given a small meal of bread and cereals . in the mosque some men were sleeping , some were praying, and some were eating, and some were maing the small meal for distribution.<br> someone was repeatedly announcing something on the microphone, but i hardly was paying attention what was been said.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/23/prositute_helping_an_old_lady~668800/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>she was a suspiciuos prositute for me, in her early 20's,her lips were painted pink, face not so charming but her complexion was fair.she caught my attention when she was helping an old woman, emancipated , short , wrinkled face , wearing bright red and orange colored sari., her eyeback framed eye glasses too big for her face. young girl brought tea from the stall for this old lady. tea was been given free as it was the 40th day of martydom of Imam Hussain. it was the day of mourinig.that is y people from all age groups were wearing black.but it was spring season and black was looking too odd. it was maing me remeber the harsh winters of sultry heat of the summers.
women were in large number , and i saw a long que of women and small girl who were been given a small meal of bread and cereals . in the mosque some men were sleeping , some were praying, and some were eating, and some were maing the small meal for distribution.
someone was repeatedly announcing something on the microphone, but i hardly was paying attention what was been said.

Comments

]]>a free verse " flower shops deserted "http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/20/a_free_verse_flower_shops_deserted~659998/2006-03-20T07:14:33+01:00 <p>white sky as white as that adolesent girl , and clouds as few as as the fears of a baby, mildly warm dusk, children shouting, one kid bullying other kids,koyal (bird) singing, two girls their hair dyed golden on a evening walk with a baby, old women sleeping in thier houses, bells of temple resting,flower shops deserted in spring time </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/20/a_free_verse_flower_shops_deserted~659998/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>white sky as white as that adolesent girl , and clouds as few as as the fears of a baby, mildly warm dusk, children shouting, one kid bullying other kids,koyal (bird) singing, two girls their hair dyed golden on a evening walk with a baby, old women sleeping in thier houses, bells of temple resting,flower shops deserted in spring time

Comments

]]>what one feelings is not always righthttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/11/what_one_feelings_is_not_always_right~633336/2006-03-11T14:19:23+01:00 <p>i just wanted to thank to her , for her help , i sent her an SMS , Oh she replied , very fast, very very fast. i felt happy may be more than that. as happy as i used to be when in autumn evening me and my mother used to burn leaves to make fire for the kangri(kangri is a firepot used to keep warm by kashmiris in wintet) twilight. she repliid that me she injured her foot , then i callled her up, she didnot picked her phone. then i started thinking she did not like my calling. i was not right , after just 15 minutes she called me, and we talked about for a long. some times what one thinks is not true.but the thinking never stops and one despite getting satisfied in life still find satisfaction incomplete, can i say 'empty'.<br> As Ghalib a poet in urdu has said that there are thousand desires for every desire i can die for, no doubt my many of my desires got fullfilled but still they are in less number<br> meanwhile the whether today is gloomy , but a gloomness which one feels cozy or may be like my girl friend whose voie make me feel like dying ember </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/11/what_one_feelings_is_not_always_right~633336/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>i just wanted to thank to her , for her help , i sent her an SMS , Oh she replied , very fast, very very fast. i felt happy may be more than that. as happy as i used to be when in autumn evening me and my mother used to burn leaves to make fire for the kangri(kangri is a firepot used to keep warm by kashmiris in wintet) twilight. she repliid that me she injured her foot , then i callled her up, she didnot picked her phone. then i started thinking she did not like my calling. i was not right , after just 15 minutes she called me, and we talked about for a long. some times what one thinks is not true.but the thinking never stops and one despite getting satisfied in life still find satisfaction incomplete, can i say 'empty'.
As Ghalib a poet in urdu has said that there are thousand desires for every desire i can die for, no doubt my many of my desires got fullfilled but still they are in less number
meanwhile the whether today is gloomy , but a gloomness which one feels cozy or may be like my girl friend whose voie make me feel like dying ember

Comments

]]>india's violence in kashmirhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/06/india_violence_in_kashmir~617122/2006-03-06T12:17:53+01:00 <p>my friends brother has got injured in the grenade attack in kashmir.sometimes when in the life we or our near ones face the real situations like these, then we feel that we are also having a right to say about suppression and we should know our rights.As i want to share here with the other bloggers that kashmir is under the indias suppression from last 50 decades .before that kashmir was an indepedent state. as million securtiy personnel in the kashmir are dotted in the valley from last 15 years and making the life of people hell ironically india announces in the UN that india is the largest democracy of the world.so absurd. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/06/india_violence_in_kashmir~617122/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>my friends brother has got injured in the grenade attack in kashmir.sometimes when in the life we or our near ones face the real situations like these, then we feel that we are also having a right to say about suppression and we should know our rights.As i want to share here with the other bloggers that kashmir is under the indias suppression from last 50 decades .before that kashmir was an indepedent state. as million securtiy personnel in the kashmir are dotted in the valley from last 15 years and making the life of people hell ironically india announces in the UN that india is the largest democracy of the world.so absurd.

Comments

]]>Bush in New Delhi, Indiahttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/02/bush_in_new_delhi_india~606582/2006-03-02T15:18:26+01:00 <p>it was a clear sunny day, as i woke up i liked to sit under sun.sun today seemed to me calm, and caressing like mother.<br> then i put on my TV, and on evry channel they were showing malnourished Bush, as usual smiling and hiding behind it mass murder of thousands of innocents.<br> i frankly get pissed off by this Bush as he is getting so much coverage in indian media that the real issues get a backseat.<br> there were protests in delhi also, left parties and many intellectuls also were present.<br> the Americans are very vulnerable today , as today all the roads were dotted with police men. and common man had to wait till the vehicles of the Bush can pass through.<br> thank God that he is not going to stay here long but the ghost of Bush will stay here for long long time</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/03/02/bush_in_new_delhi_india~606582/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>it was a clear sunny day, as i woke up i liked to sit under sun.sun today seemed to me calm, and caressing like mother.
then i put on my TV, and on evry channel they were showing malnourished Bush, as usual smiling and hiding behind it mass murder of thousands of innocents.
i frankly get pissed off by this Bush as he is getting so much coverage in indian media that the real issues get a backseat.
there were protests in delhi also, left parties and many intellectuls also were present.
the Americans are very vulnerable today , as today all the roads were dotted with police men. and common man had to wait till the vehicles of the Bush can pass through.
thank God that he is not going to stay here long but the ghost of Bush will stay here for long long time

Comments

]]>poem "Second hand book market in Delhihttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/01/14/poem_second_hand_book_market_in_delhi~469911/2006-01-14T14:28:17+01:00 <p> Second hand book market in Delhi </p> <p>Here is a city full of prisons<br> Flower shops guarding them</p> <p>I ran through their crowd<br> Their greed making them poor<br> I saw people standing over books<br> Trading knowledge in kilos<br> Grease stained fingers polishing the glossy covers<br> Sellers giving a strange smile<br> It was getting dark and cold<br> They packed their ocean of books<br> In their brown sacks five feet long<br> These second hand books are amnesic<br> Remembered nothing of their past</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2006/01/14/poem_second_hand_book_market_in_delhi~469911/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p> Second hand book market in Delhi

Here is a city full of prisons
Flower shops guarding them

I ran through their crowd
Their greed making them poor
I saw people standing over books
Trading knowledge in kilos
Grease stained fingers polishing the glossy covers
Sellers giving a strange smile
It was getting dark and cold
They packed their ocean of books
In their brown sacks five feet long
These second hand books are amnesic
Remembered nothing of their past

Comments

]]>poem " Early Dec. and world"http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/12/13/poem_early_dec_and_world~382625/2005-12-13T09:50:03+01:00 <p> Early Dec. and world</p> <p>Elections in Iraq<br> Ballot boxes heavy with blood<br> Blasts in the Hempstead, England<br> Warm and sweet sun in New Delhi<br> Earthquake of Kashmir now a history<br> Why God choose them to suffer is a mystery<br> Young people I know getting gray<br> My Mom a god<br> I, still an atheist<br> Saint reciting Kabir's* couplet<br> To people wearing Black ear phones<br> Mountains wearing white robes<br> To not feel any cold<br> World now tastes like Pizza<br> As woods are boring and old<br> Mountains and lakes phobic of us<br> Life immaculate over heaps of urban waste<br> Flowers in the coffin of plastic<br> Human touch a taboo<br> Dreams are copyrighted<br> Some painted on canvas and sold<br> Doctors are busy committing suicide without any suicide note<br> Patients attending their funerals</p> <p> *Kabir’s was a poet in the India who believed that love is the best religion in the world and denounced the orthodox religious teaching of Hinduism and Islam</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/12/13/poem_early_dec_and_world~382625/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p> Early Dec. and world

Elections in Iraq
Ballot boxes heavy with blood
Blasts in the Hempstead, England
Warm and sweet sun in New Delhi
Earthquake of Kashmir now a history
Why God choose them to suffer is a mystery
Young people I know getting gray
My Mom a god
I, still an atheist
Saint reciting Kabir's* couplet
To people wearing Black ear phones
Mountains wearing white robes
To not feel any cold
World now tastes like Pizza
As woods are boring and old
Mountains and lakes phobic of us
Life immaculate over heaps of urban waste
Flowers in the coffin of plastic
Human touch a taboo
Dreams are copyrighted
Some painted on canvas and sold
Doctors are busy committing suicide without any suicide note
Patients attending their funerals

*Kabir’s was a poet in the India who believed that love is the best religion in the world and denounced the orthodox religious teaching of Hinduism and Islam

Comments

]]>title-336334http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/25/title~336334/2005-11-25T12:50:16+01:00 <p>it is now starting of winter. festivals in Delhi have almost ended but new worries and problems have started .is it really hard to write about anything. anything means there are many things to write about. girls, women, haircuts, outings, old women basking their grey heads under the november sun. vegetable sellers selling different types of vegetables on their four wheeled trolley my neighbour s room always occupied with guys playing cards. our relative struggling with Cancer.my mother busy turning the light green plastic beads.<br> my friend wanted to see the cricket tournamnet, i was least intrested. he was also keen to see the new release taj mahal.telling me from last 3 months to give treat now wants only one kebab and two chappatis.<br> life is going on. as it should be. the children are sneaking at night but the dogs are silent, </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/25/title~336334/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>it is now starting of winter. festivals in Delhi have almost ended but new worries and problems have started .is it really hard to write about anything. anything means there are many things to write about. girls, women, haircuts, outings, old women basking their grey heads under the november sun. vegetable sellers selling different types of vegetables on their four wheeled trolley my neighbour s room always occupied with guys playing cards. our relative struggling with Cancer.my mother busy turning the light green plastic beads.
my friend wanted to see the cricket tournamnet, i was least intrested. he was also keen to see the new release taj mahal.telling me from last 3 months to give treat now wants only one kebab and two chappatis.
life is going on. as it should be. the children are sneaking at night but the dogs are silent,

Comments

]]>poem " suffocated temples'http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/23/poem_suffocated_temples~331445/2005-11-23T15:38:06+01:00 <p>suffocated temples</p> <p>these green stones of phalgam</p> <p>round like breast of women</p> <p>are temples of my heart</p> <p>clean but suffocated</p> <p>under the fast running over them</p> <p>my eyes search for the prints of my gaze</p> <p>but they are away</p> <p>alone ,terrified</p> <p>waving hands to the drunk guards<br> sipping rum on the bank of jhelum<br> but my gaze drowns<br> as tears of veiled old women settles<br> in the black lake of sorrow<br> far away her son is waiting for the prints of her gaze</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/23/poem_suffocated_temples~331445/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>suffocated temples

these green stones of phalgam

round like breast of women

are temples of my heart

clean but suffocated

under the fast running over them

my eyes search for the prints of my gaze

but they are away

alone ,terrified

waving hands to the drunk guards
sipping rum on the bank of jhelum
but my gaze drowns
as tears of veiled old women settles
in the black lake of sorrow
far away her son is waiting for the prints of her gaze

Comments

]]>title-331337http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/23/title~331337/2005-11-23T14:54:54+01:00 <p>went to homeopathic hospital with my mother . she was having acute joint pains from some days. a young lady doctor attended her, she was looking too young may be a intern.<br> yesterday tallked to my fiancee she want me to be as romantic as one is in the ones teeenage years.<br> i am too much serious about life now. women, luxury , words of love have no meaning for me. only silences of unknown faces can make out something to me. my fiancee is very much right when she says that i see every thing as an outsider. i too feel that i have become an totally outsider to even myself. dont conclude that i am depressed etc.also i dont see life as meanigless, but the way we explain life it makes it bizarre.<br> just as poetry makes expression more rich likewise to see and define life in the right words makes it worthy. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/23/title~331337/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>went to homeopathic hospital with my mother . she was having acute joint pains from some days. a young lady doctor attended her, she was looking too young may be a intern.
yesterday tallked to my fiancee she want me to be as romantic as one is in the ones teeenage years.
i am too much serious about life now. women, luxury , words of love have no meaning for me. only silences of unknown faces can make out something to me. my fiancee is very much right when she says that i see every thing as an outsider. i too feel that i have become an totally outsider to even myself. dont conclude that i am depressed etc.also i dont see life as meanigless, but the way we explain life it makes it bizarre.
just as poetry makes expression more rich likewise to see and define life in the right words makes it worthy.

Comments

]]>re define developmenthttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/22/re_define_development~328387/2005-11-22T13:31:36+01:00 <p>time here seems so much real and permanent that to say that life changes seems impossible. same suffering, same tears and same tragidies. no doubt the face of earth is changing everwhere whether it is new delhi or new york, but the suffrings are the same .<br> there is a rat race not in the peoples life styles but also in their aggresion and primitive behaviors.<br> the killings in iraq, kashmir, and palestine are few of the examples. sometimes i doubt the word 'development or civilzed and modern age.there is aliention in the cities, people are getting more psychological problems than earlier times. if in the developed countries the problem is the aloness , the developing nations are facing poverty.<br> are not we doing over generaliztion when we say we are civilized and modern, if on one earth there are<br> people starving for one meal only.we will bceocme civilzed when we will start seeing the suffering of people livivng in other parts of the same world, till then we are not objective in our stand. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/22/re_define_development~328387/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>time here seems so much real and permanent that to say that life changes seems impossible. same suffering, same tears and same tragidies. no doubt the face of earth is changing everwhere whether it is new delhi or new york, but the suffrings are the same .
there is a rat race not in the peoples life styles but also in their aggresion and primitive behaviors.
the killings in iraq, kashmir, and palestine are few of the examples. sometimes i doubt the word 'development or civilzed and modern age.there is aliention in the cities, people are getting more psychological problems than earlier times. if in the developed countries the problem is the aloness , the developing nations are facing poverty.
are not we doing over generaliztion when we say we are civilized and modern, if on one earth there are
people starving for one meal only.we will bceocme civilzed when we will start seeing the suffering of people livivng in other parts of the same world, till then we are not objective in our stand.

Comments

]]>god is playing prankhttp://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/20/god_is_playing_prank~322207/2005-11-20T11:49:28+01:00 <p>what we really exist , how we get condiotned to things which we later on we find a blunder. we never are able to hold time and we never get sucess<br> till over death. life is reallly funny and i thinkk God is playing prank with us. he is no loser , but the question is are we the losers? many of us will think that we are the losers. we lose every thing relatively, our childhood, our youth , our great companions. it is the God and its fear which we never will loose. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/20/god_is_playing_prank~322207/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>what we really exist , how we get condiotned to things which we later on we find a blunder. we never are able to hold time and we never get sucess
till over death. life is reallly funny and i thinkk God is playing prank with us. he is no loser , but the question is are we the losers? many of us will think that we are the losers. we lose every thing relatively, our childhood, our youth , our great companions. it is the God and its fear which we never will loose.

Comments

]]>winter is coming slowly.....http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/19/winter_is_coming_slowly~319906/2005-11-19T13:34:01+01:00 <p>in delhi winter is soming slowly.the recent bomb blasts in delhi will take very long for delhities to feel nip of winter this year.<br> today i wore white thin collared jersey. and blue faded jean. i felt good and fresh. i really hate dark colors , they make you gloomy and melancholic.<br> my life is still not able to gain pace. i am not really working. i quit my job after every six months , and now from last seven months i am just sitting idle.<br> i dont even feel to read anything, even my love poetry makes me feel sad.<br> my fiance calls me every day at 10 pm night , but she also is not able to make me feel good and fine as this white collared jersey has made me feel</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://mywords.blog.co.uk/2005/11/19/winter_is_coming_slowly~319906/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>in delhi winter is soming slowly.the recent bomb blasts in delhi will take very long for delhities to feel nip of winter this year.
today i wore white thin collared jersey. and blue faded jean. i felt good and fresh. i really hate dark colors , they make you gloomy and melancholic.
my life is still not able to gain pace. i am not really working. i quit my job after every six months , and now from last seven months i am just sitting idle.
i dont even feel to read anything, even my love poetry makes me feel sad.
my fiance calls me every day at 10 pm night , but she also is not able to make me feel good and fine as this white collared jersey has made me feel

Comments

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